Forgive Me.

Why are you not moving forward? What is it that keeps you from getting better? What is the block that stops you reaching your potential?

Forgiveness…

This word has come up so often in my work with patients and private coaching clients recently. All of whom seem to be doing everything they can to get better or succeed. They are eating right, thinking right and moving right. They are using chiropractors, coaches and self-help strategies. They are doing all that is asked of them by their practitioners and themselves.

However, there still seems to be a block and a barrier that will not allow them to move forward.

We are all taught that everyone deserves forgiveness, if only they ask and repent. Most of us can accept forgiving others for their actions, at least once the dust has settled. But many of us struggle with the most important forgiveness of all.

“forgive me” we say this almost as a pardon, as a ‘sorry for my actions’. When that is not what is meant by it at all. We have become detached from ourselves and our responsibilities to our actions, so much that we struggle to forgive ourselves, for our involvement.

Now I know this may sound a little deep, a little too intense for simple back pain or business goal setting. But I can assure you with my 10 plus years in practice and coaching, I know this to be the biggest and hardest barrier to move through. Forgiving yourself for your part in something, for accepting your responsibility in doing something is hard, and with a world that looks for external validation and external blame, we rarely spend time internally, with ourselves and our thoughts.

Imagine now that you are not where you want to be. You may be a little overweight, you may have missed a career opportunity, you may have fallen out of a bad relationship. What ever it is, at some level of it, some of the reason, if not all the reason for where you are, is your fault.

Yes, hard to accept sometimes and I know I write this in fear of alienating or aggravating some of you. But I sincerely write it with love.

But if you are to blame for where you are, deep down you hold a grudge with yourself, a bitterness and something you would rather ignore.
The only way to move forward and leave that past behind, to unshackle is to forgive. Forgive yourself for your part, accept responsibility, make a men’s and draw a line in the sand, stop looking over your shoulder in worry and doubt, but make peace with your actions, forgive yourself and move forward, look forward and change. It will set you free on your journey to success, happiness and improved health.

Here are three areas to get started on your path to forgiveness:

1.       Identify where you may have made a mistake.
We all make them, big and small. Have an honest look in your past, where did you make a mistake?

2.       What are you always glossing over, choosing not to recall or remember. You may not have an answer for the first question, as you may not have made a mistake. But I am sure there are actions in your life you choose not to go back to. I am asking you to think about them.

3.       Look yourself in the eye, in the mirror. And with heart say “sorry”.
No one needs to know you are doing this, no one else really cares because it is only you who needs to forgive you.

I want to thank you for reading to the end and congratulate you for being brave.

I forgive you, can you?

With love

Tom